I wish I could tell y’all what type of stuff I post here but at this point I really don’t know anymore.
you know, when i said i wanted the real world to be more like harry potter i just meant the teleportation and the butterbeer, not the entire plot of book 5 where the government refuses to do anything about a deadly threat so the teenagers have to rise up and fight back
Mods are asleep post forbidden tits
Huh
Perfectly balanced as all things should be…
Fuck somebody reblog this! People need to see the 69,420 likes and reblogs! THIS IS IMPORTANT TO THE MISSION!
I’m invested
in case you guys wanna know what modern high school dances are like, at mine despacito came on and everyone t-posed around this one kid as he fortnite danced like his life depended on it
to be fair, at a school dance when i was in school, a kid i knew had completely memorized the choreography to the gangnam style music video and the rest of us yell-sang what does the fox say noises at her while she did it.. so like, not much different. same soil different pot
if cotton eye’d joe came on everyone would make the neatest fuckign lines and do the dance in sync. it was like a cult. but hell yeah it was fun as shit
Freeze!
Same energy
one time i texted my fireman dad saying something was “lit” and he responded “please dont say that”
My dad has a hard time playing magic the gathering with me cause he’s a dealer at a casino, and I see his soul leave his body every time I shuffle my cards.
SNL - Cut for Time: My Little Step Children
This is legiterally the funniest thing snl has done in decades
they cut it because of the ONE gay reference
Same energy
both of these sketches were written by julio torres - here’s his twitter
I just want you all to know that my dramatic 6 year old ass would have loved all of this shit.
I’m the dramatique™ hand to face moment in the broken mirror.
“I’m a *rustlerustlerustle* DOG!
I’m a *rustlerustlerustle* DOG!
I’m a *rustlerustlerustle* DOG!”
If you fail to smile please unfollow me
“Man humans are lame why don’t we have like wings/horns/etc”
Humans can’t even handle having different skin colors how well do you really think that would go
#basically the plot of x-men
#literally the plot of x-men
Ya ever feel like the ideal body type for women was inherently just classism and the perfect way to treat women like trophies because like back when women were Thick™ as an ideal body type the only women who were able to look like that were the rich and today now the type is super thin and the only women who can look like that are the women who don’t work labour jobs and can afford not to have a carb diet so basically men only go for rich women and have changed how they objectify women not because of some biological quirk that shifts their lust but entirely because the form of the most privileged women has changed therefore the best trophy to keep
It literally was. Fat was hype when malnutrition and starvation were common. A symbol of leisure.
Gucci Skinny was hype when malnutrition from cheap food was common and when most of the middle class had desk jobs. Symbol of control over women who now had more rights.
Instagram Fit ™ is hype because most people are overworked and too broke to exercise or eat properly. A symbol of “leisure” and wealth.
ok this is really sweet
[captions]
Girl: “You glue them on.”
Dude 1: [very confused] “Why would you do that? I don’t glue mine on.”
Dude 2: [also confused] “Yeah, what the fuck?”
Girl: “Have you never heard of gluing them on?”
Dude 2: [incredulous] “No!”
Girl: “Watch this.” [she removes her eyelash]
Dude 1: [slightly panicked] “No, I- STOP.”
Dude 2: [shocked gasp] [pause] [concerned] “Do you still have eyelashes?”
Girl: [laughs]
